Monday, December 1, 2014

Advent Reflection

Yesterday, our church celebrated the first Sunday of Advent with reflections on what we're longing for in the world for Christ to come and make right. I wrote a prayer to share.


Here it is:

Lord Christ, on the night you were betrayed, you prayed for those who would believe in You, for the Church, to be one in unity as you are one with the Father and the Spirit. We wait for you to bring your peace and love into our world again through our lives and in the realization of your kingdom on earth. Jesus, we wait for you to make us One.

We have failed most miserably as your Church in loving one another radically. We have chosen to hold onto pride, comfort, and success instead of humbling ourselves to serve those who have offended us, doing things differently than we would have. Instead of dealing with hurts, wrongs done, and differences, we have erected walls of denominations, branches, fellowships, and organizations where we can do things the way we want to. Forgive us, Lord, and teach us, Holy Spirit, to be faithful servants who keep awake and do your work until you come again, though Christ’s return will be on a day when we do not expect and at an hour that we do not know. Jesus, we wait for you to make us One. (Matt 24:45-50, Mark 13:32-33)

You revealed beautiful humility as you submitted to the will of God the Father throughout your life on earth. And yet we choose over and over again to hold onto our rights, to allow resentment to build, to use the law against one another. God, help us instead to choose to rather be wronged! You suffered on behalf of the world which you so loved. We cause suffering to brothers and sisters who are Christ-followers but who eat unclean food, who are weaker – or stronger – than we. Forgive us, Lord, and grant us, Holy Spirit, love that builds up our brothers and sisters. Jesus, we wait for you to make us One. (Phil 4, 1 Cor 6:7, John 3:16-17, 1 Cor 8:1, 11-12)

Your bride, the Church, Gomer, who turns away, distracted by the money, the prestige, the good life (good family?), the dreams we hold onto when You are dreaming for us radical self-forgetting, obedience, quickness to listen. Henri Nouwen wrote “Hope frees us from the need to predict the future and allows us to live in the present, with the deep trust that God will never leave us alone but will fulfill the deepest desires of our heart.” Jesus, we wait for you to make us One. (Hosea)


God, as we are in Christ, side-by-side with all others who have believed His message, may we fix our eyes so attentively and adoringly on Jesus that we are not distracted by the brother or sister who stomps on our toes. God, we long for the day when we can celebrate every success of those around us without judgment, when we choose to fellowship with the weak, living with the compassion that Christ modeled. Jesus, we hold onto you together, as we wait through this long night for your coming as our groom and the wedding feast of the Lamb. Jesus, we wait for you to make us One. (Heb 12:1-3)

Friday, October 17, 2014

our house here

I don't remember if I've sent pics to everyone but I know I told a few people I'd resend some. Here they are.
This is the "long room" or "ball room".

This is the downstairs bedroom where our queen bed fit.

This is Mark out front early in the morning.

This is Mark in the kitchen! Love this room! (and that guy!)



Fall in Virginia

It's lovely here! Since most of you can't visit us this fall, here's a taste of it.
This first one is just across our driveway!
 The others are from a hike we took on Columbus Day since Mark was off.








Monday, May 26, 2014

Three years of law school - DONE!

The last semester of law school was better than the first four were; Mark was interested in his classes, not very stressed about grades, and generally knew what professors were talking about. The spring was an unexpected and exhausting adventure for me in a long-term sub position as a one-on-one aid for an emotionally disturbed third grader who runs away from school when he doesn't get what he wants.



Mark graduated from law school! I'm so proud of him! And we're so happy to have that chapter closed. Will miss a few friends and ultimate frisbee in Austin (and living with my awesome in-laws!) but overall, it's been a lonely, difficult, dry season for both of us.

What's next, you ask? Well, not a week after graduation, and he's already back at the books, studying for the bar exam, which he will take in Virginia at the end of July. While he studies for these next two months, we're in Roswell, NM, with my family, including sweet nieces and nephews. :)

As for work, we're really excited that he was awarded a fellowship (think grant) to work on a project he created, serving limited English proficient clients who are victims of aggressive debt collection and payday/car title lending. He'll work for the same legal aid office he interned with last May-June in Harrisonburg, VA.

I will continue my master's program in Conflict Transformation at Eastern Mennonite University starting in August. I'm really excited to see where God leads me with this, as there are a number of areas of conflict in the Christian community that are on my heart right now.

We have a few more nieces/nephews on the way, this time on the Dawson side, and we're excited for the changes in the family.

Come visit us in the beautiful Shenendoah Valley! We'll be between Shenendoah National Park and George Washington National Forest. There are fireflies in the summer, pretty leaves in the fall…and we don't yet know what wonders the other seasons offer. Harrisonburg was also recently rated number 19 on the list of  "Most exciting small cities in America"! We will have a spare room. Please come see it after August!

Some people are asking when we're leaving the country next, and we don't know the answer to that. We hope to be in Harrisonburg for two years then head overseas after that to put our educations to good use. Mark wants to pursue anti-corruption law. We're also seeking God about what it looks like for us to be parent-figures, which might include foster care? Please pray for us to hear and obey whatever God tells us about this.

Monday, March 31, 2014

A Little Bit more on Centering Prayer

My reading this morning was from Romans 12, and after reading it in The Message I want to dig into it a bit more. There’s some good stuff in here that’s applicable to centering prayer! “Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him…Fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you…God brings [all this goodness] to you. The only accurate way to understand ourselves is by what God is and by what he does for us, not by what we are and what we do for him.

Also, I went back to my notes from a Centering Prayer Workshop to double check what they said the purpose was:
"The principle effects of centering prayer are experienced in daily life, NOT in prayer itself."
- ability to live in the present moment, ability to let go
- growing capacity to listen to others and forget ourselves as number one
- non-judgmental attitude, more open to giving and receiving

During the months and months of waiting for news about Mark's applications for post-graduate fellowships, Centering Prayer has been a really meaningful practice for both of us to remind ourselves that God is in control and working in us and for us.

Sunday, March 23, 2014

And a bit on Centering Prayer

5 min intro to Centering Prayer:

I am a task-oriented person. I go to the grocery store and come out with only what was on my list. A few years ago, I felt let to give up “to do” lists for Lent because I was basing my personal worth on how many things I got checked off in a day. I was putting too much of my identity in what I was doing. God was asking me to trust Him to bring to mind things I needed to do.

In the midst of busy life, I have found spiritual disciplines to be essential. Today, I want to share about centering prayer, a type of contemplative prayer that can help us to be more God-focused. We may speak to God often in prayer, but it’s harder to listen to God. Silence can be uncomfortable.
Centering prayer is a tool to connect and to get us out of our ordinary awareness and all that consumes us. It is an exercise in being your true self (who we ARE) before God in Christ, allowing the stuff we DO to fade away. Many of the things that fill our time are just a smoke screen for our true selves. But God sees us as we truly are and accepts us completely. We let go of our own agenda and give the control over to God.

This is a still, silent prayer of inviting and receiving God’s presence. He knows the deep places in our hearts that need healing, and he can work on that level.
We know that Jesus spent a lot of time alone with God during His earthly life. He often got up early or seemed to escape to a quiet place to pray. He served as our example and He is the way for us to come to the Father (John 14:6-7). He has given us the Holy Spirit in us. This prayer helps us to be unified with God.

Here’s what we’ll do. First, we start with a meditative reading (Psalm), then I will ring the gong to begin our 20 minutes of silence. During the 20 minutes, we want to continually recognize an intention and consent to open ourselves to God’s presence and action in our lives. You can choose a word or image to “center” on, representing your intention to say “yet” to God. It should be 1-2 syllables. For example, I often use “Jesus, Peace, Grace”. This is not a mantra but a tool to gently bring you back to the purpose of consenting to God. When 20 minutes is up, I’ll ring the gong again, and end in a spoken prayer.

During the time of silence, you will have a lot of thoughts. Try to let those thoughts pass by; don’t engage them. It’s like your thoughts are little boats on a river and you’re floating in the same river, allowing the current of God to carry you. Some of the thought boats may bump you, but just let it go and keep in God’s flow.
4 R’s – Resist no thought, Retain no thought, React emotionally to no thought, Return ever-so-gently
Do not judge the prayer; it is not good or bad, even if you really struggle to let go of thoughts. Keep practicing after you leave here. It may be uncomfortable but that’s okay, many new things are. The rewards of surrendering to God in this way are worth the discomfort.



CP: 20 min
Psalm 131
My heart is not proud, O Lord, my eyes are not haughty;
I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me.
But I have stilled and quieted my soul; like a weaned child with its mother;
Like a weaned childe is my soul within me.
O Israel, put your hope in the Lord both now and forevermore.

Set timer
gong
20 minutes of silence
gong
prayer


“Almighty and eternal God, so draw our hearts to you, so guide our minds, so fill our imaginations, so control our wills, that we may be wholly yours, utterly dedicated unto you; and then use us, we pray, as you will, and always to your own glory and to the welfare or your people; through our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, Amen.” – BCP 832-833

What I got to share at a Women's Retreat

Notes for women’s retreat talk
God's Abundant Gifts/ Celebrating the Seasons of Our Lives!/ Story of Faith

Psalm 19:14 “May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart
 be pleasing in your sight, 
Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.”

Good morning! My name is Karen Dawson. This morning, I am going to tell you a bit about my spiritual journey, introduce you to a friend of mine who I consider to be a hero of faith, reflect on a scripture passage from Matthew 16, and tie together my thoughts.  So first, let me tell you a little bit about myself:
I grew up in New Mexico as a Christian in a non-denominational church. As early as high school, I recognized my “cardinal” sins – pride and judgment.

One of my favorite books that deals with this subject, Repenting of Religion: (subtitled) Turning from Judgment to the Love of God by Gregory Boyd says:
“The goal of creation is for people to participate in the eternal love of the triune God. How we do this is not by performing good deeds, successfully conquering certain sins, holding all the right theological opinions, or becoming ‘religious’ people. These may be bi-products of the change in reality that takes place in us, but they are not the cause of the change. We participate in the eternal love of the Trinity by allowing ourselves to be placed in Christ by faith. It is simply a matter of saying yes to God’s desire to relate to us.” (pg 38)

Back to my story, I went to college at a Christian liberal arts university in Arkansas where I studied social work and family ministry, and I am married to Mark who is in his last semester at UT law school.
After college and before I was married, I lived in Zambia for two and a half years, where I was a missionary, teaching American kids and discipling street kids, who had been kicked out of their homes or run away and were surviving by begging in the city. I was just as surprised as anyone that I ended up in Africa, and even working with teenage boys who are addicted to sniffing glue! I have lived a very blessed life, but hadn’t grown up thinking I’d be a missionary. At times I was a bit anxious about
Luke 12:48, which says “From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.”
Maybe that’s one explanation of why God called me to Africa where the discomforts of life are a bit more prevalent than in the US. Although I’d never been to Africa before, in 2007, I moved to Zambia, and it changed my life.
For one thing, that’s where I met Ruth, a Zambian lady who’s a few years older than I am and who became my best friend. I’m going to share some of her story, starting with what she wrote to me recently: “My sister, it’s time for me to tell people what God has done in my life. The time has come for me to tell the world what God has done! They need to know that we serve a mighty, powerful God. What he has done for me, he can do it for them too.”

History: Ruth had grown up without parents, moving around among extended family members, eventually landing in her sister’s home. She still has only a ninth grade education. At 16, just after choosing to give her life to Jesus, she became pregnant by rape and became suicidal. Because of a number of complexities, mostly cultural, Ruth did not tell the people at her church that she had been raped. She became an object of gossip at her church as a young mother with a child and no one to provide for them.

When I met Ruth, her daughter, Gina, was 7 years old. The three of us were housemates for a year, and the way Ruth lived her life amazed and challenged me. I would hear her up praying in the middle of the night. She was so involved with neighbors who were in difficult situations and was a powerful mother figure and preacher to the street kids we worked with. She has had many health issues, possibly caused by the rape: painful menstrual cycles, surgeries, uterine cancer… Funny story: one time, I picked her up after a surgery. She was still under anesthetics, and she said “Karen, is that really you? I will know it’s you if you’re wearing a headband.” I realized one of the ways I was coping with the ruggedness of Africa was by wearing my hair tucked back in a headband everyday!
Through these and so many more hardships, Ruth has trusted God to defend and provide for her and her daughter. She lives by Matthew 6:33 which says “Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”


2008


Last semester, my husband was studying at a university in southern Africa, and by God’s providence, Ruth and Gina were living in the same city so we got to reconnect!
Now: Gina is a beautiful teenage girl with incredible potential, Ruth has found her passion in doing women’s ministry. Her message is simple. She wrote: “God has laid something big on my heart. He told me Ruth, it’s not about you; it’s about the souls that are out there.’ God has been teaching me how to be humble and to serve others. It’s not me time; it’s others. God wants me help others. Remember, my sister, God is faithful to you. The Bible says you can do all things through Christ who gives you strength. Joshua 1:7-8 Be strong and courageous. Don’t worry about anything; pray about everything. Don’t allow the devil to steal the joy that God has given to you, my sister.  He makes us focus on ourselves. This joy I have, the world didn’t give to me.
Ruth isn’t perfect. She’s a lot like me. We had normal conflicts when we lived together, like how late was okay for playing music and whether I had told her I didn’t have my key so not to lock the door. She yells at her daughter and gets scared. She’s a normal, sinful human, but God has given her a much harder cross to bear than many of us and He’s given her the faith to follow Him in the midst of hard stuff. [Picture]

During my first week in Zambia, Ruth and I went on a walk after dinner. It was dark, and the road was in bad condition with lots of potholes. My eyes couldn’t see the potholes, so I was walking very slowly. Her eyes had adjusted and she walked much quicker than I because she knew where they were. God calls us to different places and experiences. He gives us what we need and the grace to sustain us in the unique circumstances He calls us to.

2013


Matt 16:24-27 “Then Jesus said to his disciples, ‘If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it. What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul? For the Son of Man is going to come in his Father’s glory with his angels, and then he will reward each person according to what he has done.’”

There are a few things I want to pull out of Ruth’s story, overlap with my story, and challenge you with.

We each have our own role in the Body of Christ. Of course, we are all to bring glory to God, but it looks differently from person to person. We must be doing what he has uniquely called us to. Ruth’s testimony resonates deeply with some people who wouldn’t even want to talk to me. Likewise, I am able to talk to people who would, to their own detriment, brush her off as uneducated and therefore not worth listening to. We must each take up our own cross.

Coming from a person who struggles with perfectionism and judging, I’ve found helpful understanding in looking at the different stages in our faith journeys. Examples of these stages are recognition of God, discipleship, productivity, inward journey, outward journey and life of love. Often depending on how long a person has been following Christ, their life will look differently from mine. Some people go through the same stage a few times throughout their lives. God is leading each of us in our own spiritual timeline. We must not judge others because they are called to different things or at different times than we are.  This means accepting denominational differences and working for unity within the church body here in our relationships at St. Richards and in the church worldwide!) BUT that doesn’t mean sacrificing truth for grace; where Scripture is explicit, we must stand firm even if it is unpopular.

As God has given us unique strengths and life experiences, he enables us to do the things he calls us to and his Grace is sufficient for our weakness. (2 Cor 12:9-10) we may not have a life of convenience and ease. We may be unpopular. We are called to take up our cross.

As women, we are especially prone to comparing ourselves with others, physically, in our housekeeping or professional lives, how we parent, and just about every other possible subject. When I lived in Zambia, many ladies at my sending church would compare themselves to me and say “Oh, I could never do that!” and put me on a pedestal of which I was NOT worthy. When we look at what others are doing (even good people, even missionaries) and try to emulate what they are doing instead of their relationships with God, we compromise our own calling. We are not all meant to be Amy Carmichal or Mother Teresa. But we can learn from the way they loved people where God put them. We can sharpen each other by sharing stories and learning from similar situations or mistakes.

As CHRISTIAN women, we are free to to remember that our success is not based on how we measure up to anyone else but it’s about our being faithful to God and obedient to what He’s told us to do, what He’s called us to.

Some of you who know Mark and I are asking about our future. We are living in a season of faith and hope, waiting on God to show us what comes after law school as we pursue our callings.